Don’t blame yourself! There was nothing you could have done! It was all their fault, I mean what kind of a person does that to other people? Have you ever heard this before and thought to yourself, “it’s not my fault, it’s somebody else’s fault”. Well, sorry, sometimes you just got to blame yourself for the things that happen to you.
The harsh truth is, for 90% of the situations you have been in, good or bad it was your fault!
The end of last year created some of the harshest obstacles I have ever seen in my life. Most notably a good friend of mine who was renting out a room in my house ended up steeling my identity, creating credit cards in my name, and spending nearly $3,000 in my name in the 2 weeks before he was caught.
It’s really easy to blame him for everything and say that he was just pure evil for doing that to someone he called a friend. And he was. There has to be a lot of evil in his heart to do what he did. Now, he has to be the one to deal with the consequences of his own actions.
However looking back on it, I have to blame myself as well. My bedroom door was always unlocked, there were warning signs that he was not to be trusted, and I simply portrayed myself as an easy target.
Most people aren’t evil, but by being too trusting with the people closest to me, I was inevitable going to run into the scam artists, thieves, and just plain nasty people.
By being too trusting and by not listening to all of the warning signs you can attract crazies who seek out people like you. I’ve seen it happen to not only myself but to a few close family members.
There are people who will seek out others that they think are “easy targets” and while these people may end up going to jail or pissing off the wrong person eventually they do it anyways, because that is the kind of people they are.
By acting so trusting and by portraying yourself as an easy target you attract these people into your life and that is exactly what I ended up doing.
I have to take responsibility for myself for attracting this. There is no other way around it. I unintentionally let it happen by taking the actions I did.
If I don’t want to see it happen to me again I understand that I will have to change my actions and protect myself a little better. I have to do this not because I believe everyone is out to get me, but just in case I run into another person seeking to steal his way through life.
Why Should YOU Take The Blame For Things That Happen To You?
“Either you run the day or the day runs you.” Jim Rohn
You can blame other people for your misfortunes. Or you can blame yourself. If you blame other people, than you are accepting the fact that you have no control over your own life.
After all, if it is somebody else’s fault then there was nothing you could have done about it from the start. It was just pure dump luck that you fell into this particular situation and came in contact with these particularly bad people on earth.
If you blame yourself you realize that you had a hand in creating your own misfortune. It means that your actions caused it to happen. And the good news is, unlike the “random bad luck of the universe” your actions can be changed.
By blaming yourself you are giving yourself the power to do something about it. No longer are you just relying on luck to live the life that you want. No longer are you blaming someone else for every aspect of your life.
“Do not weep; do not wax indignant. Understand.” Baruch Spinoza
When you look at yourself you will find that there are things you could have done to avoid bad situations. You realize that there are steps you should take and things you should be more aware of next time it happens to you.
Einstein’s Theory Of Insanity
Einstein’s theory of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again expecting different results.
The interesting thing about people who are always “running into bad luck” is that they are always blaming other people. It is never their fault, yet the same type of things happen to them every few months.
The person who keeps getting stood up on dates and put into the “friend zone” can complain all they want about how women are mean to them. But at some point you have to realize that women who care about you wouldn’t do that to you.
If you keep getting stood up on dates or lead astray by members of the opposite sex it means you are not doing enough to build attraction from them.
Somehow the actions you are taking aren’t making them like you in the way that you would like them too. If you want different results you have to try different things.
The person who keeps starting businesses the same way and keeps falling flat on their face can blame government regulations, poor customers, or whatever they want.
But if they are smart they will eventually come to the conclusion that maybe they are doing something wrong with their business. There has to be a reason why the businesses they start fail.
What are they doing wrong that millions of entrepreneurs around the world are doing right? There has to be something. Things happen for a reason, and if they keep happening, that reason has to be you.
Remember Einstein’s theory of insanity. If you want different results you have to start doing different things.
The Path To Self Improvement
What is self improvement if you cannot blame yourself for your past actions? The only way to grow is to look for areas that you can improve upon and work on them until you are the best you can be.
Nobody is perfect. We all make mistakes. The key is to look at our past experiences and find out how we can better ourselves from those experiences.
What did we do during the good times to make them so good? What did we do during the bad times to make them so bad?
Everything happens for a reason, and when it comes to your life, you are normally the one responsible for your luck. Figure out why and you can grow. Blame others and you will shrink. Life is hardly ever as black and white as that. But it this case it is.
“I don’t believe you have to be better than everybody else. I believe you have to be better than you ever thought you could be.” Ken Venturi